When to bend the rules... when to hug the rules...

Everyday at work or wherever it maybe we are at that time… we come across situations where people bend the rules… it can be as trivial as cutting the line in a candy store or pulling your car into a spot that someone had put their lights for or letting your buddies cut into a line or it could be a little less than trivial stuff like fudging accounts, hiding stuff, not revealing the whole truth when its needed or over-stating your experience on your resume or producing documents proving your credibility even though you only saw them 10 minutes back yourself…

Where do you draw the line.. as to what constitutes an acceptable bend of the rule and what constitutes a down right no-no breaking the rule. Is it down to perception, is it interpretation, is it down to your own courteous attitude, is it your conscience, is it your patience or a personal score card you have that says your can commit 5 wrongs for every 10 rights that you do in life…

Is it crazy to think about such stuff.. I mean do people who bend the rules really think about what they did, say there’s a 20 head count line at a local post office with a min 5 minute processing time per customer, what if your manager walks in, are you obligated to let him cut into your line? If you do let him cut in, is it because you are afraid of him or is it because you like him, is it fair on the hefty number of people standing behind your for the last several minutes.. Does your manager thank his good luck or does he take a minute to feel sorry for the guys he cut infront of, does he feel sorry he put you in such a spot..

I think the simplest answer is that, people who cut in don’t give a rat’s rear.. if they did they wont even think twice about standing in the order they walked into the place. It’s a sad truth, it’s a world of not what you know, but, who you know. At work you can see people who kiss up to the management get the right assignment over someone who talks sense. It happens all the time. I think the only people who think about this is those who are caught in the middle. A guy who always follows the rules doesn’t even notice that a guy cut infront of him, infact he wont care one bit, the guy who cuts in doesn’t care one bit either. It’s the people who follow the rules reluctantly and immediately that get tempted when someone bends it that feel wronged.

They go, “well, that’s what I wanted to do.. but look at him.. he did that… I cant believe the others didn’t notice it..” This is a trivial example. I chuckled today, when I overheard a couple of guys talk this… Dude1.. “Hey did you pay the registration tax for the car” Dude2 “yeah” Dude 1 “How much?” Dude 2 “X” Dude1 “I hope you understated the value of the purchase” Dude2” No, why ?” Dude1”to pay lower taxes.. I did it.. everyone does it” Dude2 “Not me, I wanna sleep well” Dude1 “You are hopeless man”. Crazy right?.. well, for most its not that crazy. A guy who not only understated his car value to pay lesser taxes, mentions to the other guy what an idiot he was for following the rules. The world has turned pale my friends, you can see it everywhere, there’s no place that’s not vulnerable to rule-bending… I fall in the middle group, you know someone who hates when others break the rules or bend the rules but don’t have the guts or the heart to do it myself.

Once a rental car company forgot to charge me for an insurance package I used, it was quite a lot of money for someone like me who lives paycheck to paycheck, I thought for 10 seconds and told them they charged me less. I felt good for about 2 minutes, not good forever because I didn’t tell them immediately.. I thought about “not telling” them… but I did after wrestling with myself. I got a big thank you… that’s it… but how many people do that, what if the cash register guy gives 50 bucks extra, does everyone of you return it. What if they charge you only once for 2 cartons of milk do you go back and pay ? I don’t claim I do it often or everytime… but these are situations that fascinate me.

Then there’s the whole big bad ballgame of politics that people play at work, fudging resumes, fudging tax breaks and misstating information to get more money back. No place is beyond limit for these people, infact I personally know a few friends who invented “teams that they managed” offshore to get quicker green card processing in the US. How crazy is that? Well, not real crazy is they are always used to cutting infront of lines, or stealing parking spots or fudging account information. When you start fudging a little , you just don’t stop. And the crazy part both of those guys are getting their residency approved next week….

At times I laugh at my inability to be like them, at times I cant believe I stick to the rules while others bend it without issues and laugh at us for being incapable to do the same, at times I feel like a moron… the only thing I have going at those times? I get a good night’s sleep, because I can getup in the morning and say, I didn’t cheat a single person till yesterday.. I have a clear conscience..

It’s painful to be an incapable rule bender… but then not.. it feels far better to be a reluctant rule follower and am a proud one at that…